1.10 - Family Reunion (pt.2)

"So I finally get to meet you in person..."

Is she supposed to hug him? Call him dad? No, too early.
Kerry has a father. A real father whose identity is no longer a mystery. It's hard to believe. After some back and forth texting they meet for the first time on a sunday afternoon in a nice little coffeehouse in town.

They start with some cautious smalltalk, both of them clearly shocked at the recent revelation.
"I can't believe it yet either", Marcus says, shaking his head in disbelief. "I have a grown daughter...  and such a beautiful one too!"
Kerry shifts uncomfortably in her seat and looks down at her salad. If there's one thing that makes her feel uneasy it is men more than twice her age complimenting her appearance.

"Did you have a suspicion that you might have a child somewhere?"
"Not at all! Why'd I take the test? Same as everyone else I suppose, was curious about my ancestry, my culture, that stuff. I was mindblown when the site told me it found my daughter! Grace, your mom, hmm... we weren't together for long, and then she kinda vanished before it became serious. I had no idea, man. Wish she had let me know but oh well. Can't change the past."

Kerry hesitates. "Would you have stayed if she had given you the chance?"
"Hmm. I wasn't planning kids at this time in my life, but I would have tried my best to find a solution for us. A child is as much the dad's responsibility as the mom's, yeah?"
Once again his words strike a chord in Kerry and once again stares at her salad. Why is she being so sensitive today? It's like every word sends her down a thought spiral.
Marcus does notice, but he thinks she's just nervous about meeting him in person.

She attempts to shift the conversation to less emotional topics. "So what do you do for a living?"

"I'm a firefighter", he smiles, "started there as a boy, never stopped. Gives you a sense of fulfillment like no other job, and your comrades become your family. It's tough, but it's worth it. Keeps your body and mind healthy too."
"A firefighter!", Kerry exclaims. "Ruby will love this, she has a firetruck toy she always plays with!"
"... Ruby?"
Oh, right. She hasn't filled him in on the details yet because she wasn't sure if he could be trusted. Details such as being a single mom of two at an age where others enjoy a carefree life.

"Pff, I'm still trying to come to terms with having a daughter and now you're telling me I have grandchildren as well? I don't even know what to say anymore!", he laughs.
"Wait, let me show you some pics!"

She always says she's not that kind of mom who have nothing else to talk about than their children, but she is proud of them and it's definitely a much safer topic than fathers and their responsibilities.

***

It took more than one meeting for Kerry to trust him enough but eventually she feels like it's time to introduce her daughters to their new grandpa. The real challenge is to explain it to the kids. It was hard enough for Kerry to process that she has a father, so how could she explain it to a small child? For little Jade it's not that much of an issue; she's still too young to understand and it won't be much different for her than meeting a new babysitter or any friend of Kerry. Ruby on the other hand is old enough to actually understand the concept of grandparents, and to wonder where hers have been and why her grandpa suddenly showed up. But she's also too young to hear the whole story.

"I never had a grandpa", she replies in confusion.
"Well, you do now."
"Why not when I was a baby?"
"Because I lost him. Remember when you asked me about your dad? Well, just like you dont know your dad, I didnt know mine either. Now I do."
"Will I know my dad later? "
"Hm. Maybe, Ruby."
"Why did you lose grandpa?"
"Sometimes people lose one another. It just happens."

Ruby sobs. Then cries. "I don't want to lose you!"
"Nonono, you will never lose me! I promise you!" Kerry immediately kicks herself for her choice of words. Way to scare a preschooler by telling them stories of randomly vanishing parents. "Oh Ruby, don't cry please. We won't lose each other, I promise you, ok?"

 The plan is to meet at the city playground: Marcus brings his dog Dexter along and Kerry comes with the girls. It's not exactly the nicest playground you could imagine but it's the only kid-appropriate place in the city where you could meet up.

She didn't want to take the girls to his place because that might have been too much 'new' for Ruby to get used to and her own apartment wasn't an option either because it's just too small.
"I don't even have anywhere for us to sit down. I had to move my old couch out to make space for Jade's bed when she was born."
"Any plans to move?", Marcus reads between the lines.
"I'd love to if I found something affordable. We're doing better now than only a couple of years ago, I can afford to send Ruby to dance class and don't have to worry about how to pay the next bill. But we still live... modestly. I really want a nice place to eat meals together, and when Ruby starts school in 2 years I don't want her to do her homework on the floor. My girls should be able to invite schoolfriends over and maybe even have their own room each. I'm working hard to achieve that."

The adults talk about boring things like careers, wages, apartments, and the woes of living in the city, until Ruby, who has been very quiet so far, surprises Kerry with an uncomfortable question:
"Do I have a grandma too?"
Kerry hesitates for a moment but then shakes her head. "No... you don't have a grandma."
"Why not?"
"Not everyone has a grandma."

Marcus looks surprised at these words but keeps quiet until Ruby runs off again to play with Jade.

"She never met her?", he asks when Ruby is out of earshot.
"I told you, mother and I don't have the best relationship."
"I know but... not knowing you have grandchildren is pretty crazy", says the man who hadn't known he has grandchildren.

Soon Ruby gets over her initial shyness and Jade shows interest in the new man as well. Looking at them playing together gives Kerry almost a feeling of a normal family. That's probably what it looks like to any passerby. Maybe one day she can believe it too.

***

Two streets further down another young woman is also leading an eventful but happy family life. Kerry's best friend Ramona has given birth to her second child: a baby girl named Tonia. Just like Ruby and Jade, the two kids are half-siblings. Unlike Ruby and Jade, they will grow up with a father figure at home.
Having a husband who helps with kids, household, and income is quite the luxury compared to being forced into a working single mom role, which is why Ramona often helped her friend out in the past few years by playing the babysitter whenever Kerry needed more time for work (or just for herself).

But even a married mother is stressed and exhausted after the birth of a new baby, so Kerry decides it is time to pay her back for her help and support and give something in return.

Besides, it is easy to forget behind that bubbly personality of hers but Ramona also had to face her hardships in her previous relationship. It's the reason they became friends in the first place.

The couple wanted to turn the spare guest room into a bright nursery and Kerry volunteered to help Ramona's husband with the renovations. 'Help' in this case means putting together all the new SIMKEA furniture alone because the man in the house is completely useless in this regard and can hardly tell a hammer from a screwdriver, let alone follow an assembly instruction

It's a good opportunity for Kerry to show her thanks to the Sterling-Marks family: not many people know that she's quite skilled when it comes to building, assembling, or fixing anything in the house, maybe as a consequence of having grown up with no father and a drinking mother. You just have to learn how to take care of everything yourself.

***

Back home.
Ruby has been doing baby ballet every week since she turned 4. At this age it is not really formal ballet training; it's essentially stretching and singing songs, jumping around to various music, and trying to clap to the rhythm. It is a good way to socialize with kids her age and more importantly an outlet for the girl's excess energy: the small apartment and not very kid-friendly city limit their opportunities for playing and running around.

Jade throws a crying fit every time Kerry takes Ruby to the dance studio because she wants to join her big sister.
"Wooby dance?!", she sobs angrily, which means something along the lines of 'If Ruby can go to dance class, then why can't I?' in toddler language.
"Not yet, Jade, you're too young.", Kerry says every single time. "And they only allow girls who are potty trained to dance. You need to go on the potty before you can go to ballet class with Ruby!"
"OK", she says and runs over to the potty.
"..."

Maybe it's because she's frustrated that she can't do all the things Ruby does yet, but Jade is definitely a handful compared to her sister.